Everyday Drama Dog - Yes, I said Dog!

In a weak moment upon the passing of a beloved canine, my husband and I decided to get another dog. Being that it was the month before Christmas (2008), we thought it would be a great gift for our kids (8 and 4 years of age). Who wouldn't want their kids to grow up with a dog of their own they had nurtured since childhood? Now my husband and I both being college educated should have maybe thought this through a little more thoroughly. He has a Masters degree so technically he should be smarter than me, right? So after weeks of research, discussions and decisions, we settled on a medium-sized dog that could not escape our wrought iron fence (make a note of this comment, will you?) and chose a German Shorthaired Pointer puppy that would become our new baby on Christmas Eve.

She was the sweetest of all puppies. She smelled like a puppy, slept like a puppy, played like a puppy, ran like a puppy, CHEWED like a puppy and PEED like a puppy. All of these things my hubby and I were aware of having owned many dogs in our two separate lifetimes but some things fade from memory, like the pains of childbirth. (Why else would you ever have more than one?)

Of course, as we all know the circle of life, puppies get older and grow into dogs. Now being that we purchased a "working" dog, we had the best of intentions to have her trained to flush out birds for our family hunting endeavors. Did this training pan out? Not so much. First, it was finding a place to send her, then it was the finances of paying for it, etc, etc... So we opted to just do obedience training. My father told me several times that if I would put my mind to it, I could do it myself. Only 30 minutes a day, he said. So off I went to the bookstore and purchased the suggested material.

I truly believe if I was a single person training my dog with no other influences, I might could have done it. However, add my husband who uses his own language to train her, my kids who just scream at her - even when she does right and you have a formula for a very confused dog. My older dog (10+ years) is not trained but does mind well when he is not sleeping. I will say that she knows a few commands but "stop" is not one of them, as it was reinforced to me earlier this week.

Yesterday evening I was working in the front yard as my kids finished dinner, waiting patiently for my hubby to arrive home. My kids finished up and headed out to find me and when they did, my daughter opened the gate to our yard only to have it slam shut and NOT latch. The next 30 seconds were in slow motion. I heard the gate slam and bounce back, then I heard Hazel's collar rattling and looked up to see her sprinting past me like she was in the 50 meter dash in the Olympics. She cleared the length of my driveway, my street and was across at the other end of the pond from my house in about 9.4 seconds. All before I could pull a 180 and scream for her to come. I was not equipped in my marathon running shoes or sports bra but took off after her anyway. There have been occasions where I caught her as she was distracted by the dozen or so ducks on the water but not in this instance. She bypassed the ducks and the next street over, only to head full-bore to the ranch on the backside of our neighborhood. Me running in 1/4" thick Reef flip-flops, black t-shirt and paint stained shorts, all the while screaming at my dog to stop made for quite a show of the newest electee to the Harbour View Homeowners Board of Directors. Nice. I made it approximately 1/8 of a mile, dripping in sweat, before I turned around and started sprinting back to the house to load the kids in the car to retrieve my animal.

We drove 3 full circles of our 'hood as we so lovingly call it, with my kids hanging out of the car yelling for our dog. I am now starting to get nervous as the rain is coming and so is dusk. I made the last circle and told the kids we were going home to get my cellphone and begin calling the neighborhood watch to be on the lookout for her when low and behold, she appeared across the street from our house at the pond. I am fairly certain from the length of her tongue, she lapped us and went back to flush out the ducks. We lured her to the driveway and back into the gate where I confirmed its closure this time.

I have no one to blame but myself I know,(and my husband who will for sure get more blame than I will). However, I would not expect a dog that gets 2 meals a day, a cushy bed that is washed and dried with a dryer sheet and the honor of sleeping in the A/C almost every night, to make a break for it. I do not enjoy watching the brown spot under her very short tail as it streaks across the acreage of my 'hood.

So to all my friends and neighbors, if you see her doing the dash again, load her up and bring her home. She is very friendly and does not bite. I will note that I am now on the hunt for a shock collar and a manual showing the proper techniques to using it. If I am successful, I may use it on my kids.